duckchronicles

Double failure, suck in studies and suck at everything. Im such a failure.

But, i will not give up.
不会放弃，直到最后一刻。

Leadership is about changing, driving and affecting people for the good. It cannot be measured or compared, but by how significant one's life can be changed and altered for the better. It cannot be measured in quantity too, even if its just one person, it means his world.

Friendship, bonds that cannot be easily broken. They are like threads of lotus roots, may though be battered, but bond remains. It is invisible, but forged in the heart, and could only be felt by individuals, not by actions, but by memories shared together. It is another form of love, that is pure, without selfishness, desire, or lust, but plain heartfelt warmth that lingers forever, unmoved by time.

Love, a very profound thing indeed, it exists and roots in many ways and forms, in our everyday life that keeps our heart beating. For that everything are created from love, even hatred, love that has been thwarted and warped into the wrong way. Being blinded by hatred, is akin to be blinded by love, for thats the thing that one could hold on dearly, even to their last breath. Love is also the thing that guides and cause one remain fervently, unchanging. Through love that we could see precious qualities in human, like determination, perseverance and resistance. 

Precious lesson on leadership and love.

                                                                           

I'm still hanging there.

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The Show - Lenka</div>^ ^ love this song

Yesterday was a chore of boredom, practically did nothing at all apart from starring hard at the clock for time to past. Collection dwindles as economy, lowest were $4s while highest were $12s. But nvm, something heartening is that i can afford to eat and spend more extravagantly cuz these 'tops up' to my new month of pocket money. Rather than complaining which spoils the whole mood of the season, why not think optimistically:)

Today is a tv day, i guess, only to be stucked at home to rot. Watched doraemon in the pleasant morning:)its a great show. Then, i realised that i havent filled up my hefei reflection booklet yet. Emotions pinched.

All the things that happened since the first day, boarded n touched down on nanjing. Exchanged caps with chingye allan n weiyan then board onto the coach. Had lunch and went to confucius temple................... ... .... it went on.

Everything happened so vividly and so quickly, it seems to be yesterday n a flash from now. Just when i realised, its already over. But all these things will always be a part of me, in me, that makes who i am. All the friends i've made, meant to me much more of how much i could imagine. I'm missing the times again, and it sores even more..

I cant make myself to do the reflections, i dont know why.

Today was wasted. Both time and money.

Darn, i didnt go for today's training to retake a new IC photo as friday is the submission. School's one was kind of screwd up and i looked as if im a jail bird. :/ Didnt want to skip training at all, but considering that its a life kinda thing so i was forced by the circumstance to skip training. Darn, how am i gonna make up for it. Feels bad skipping..

(I am not gonna do it again, i promise.)

Anyway, was anticipating to take a nice photo but everything got so screwd up.. Paid $$15 and the hair cut sux. Darn, it seems professional but the hairdresser was like 'normally for students, we give them slope cuz their hair is too short. Layer is for long hair'. -.- Darn, my hair was killed.. T.T Looks as if got bitten by a dog at the back n the side burn... She sloped me, wtf. Wats more is that she 'trimmed' the hair both at the back and top like shit... Dont even seem like layered and spiking is disgusting.

Hence, i wasted $15 and another $6 for a decent IC photo with a ugly sight of myself.

In class, Bryan was like "haha 15years later when ur son ask to see ur ic photo, he think that ur a gangster from a jail school."

Well, now i think id rather retain my hair n use that photo.

This is a nice cool song that keeps repeating in my head. Hmm im addicted to it.

Alright, today was supposed to be a happy day until i reach home. So i guess i'll start on cheerful stuffs.

Today went to training and played match. :D I guess i kinda got the hook of floaters and the instinct of killing spikes. Gotta polish on my setting so i can set for my teammates, a step to there!

Expected to leave the classroom brain dead after the maths refresher test, surprised to find that its not that bad afterall. Just my time management cuz i couldnt get to finish 3pages... 14marks T.T (hope theres point rewarded for working)

Found some new breakdancing enthus! Hope can form a crew with chingye, zixi, me and wilfred (not his friends, pls.)

Ok, here comes the infuriating part. I'm kind of sad as 3 of my betta fries died while choking onto blood worms, which im actually witnessing another one dying.. Heartache, no doubts and extremely down in fact. I merely said a bit of my thoughts n feelings, which my sis got damn f-ed up. Cuz she has been helping me to take care of em and was indirectly responsible for it.

BUT, I have never blamed her and i felt that it was my responsibility that they died as im supposed to care for em myself. Instead, i am grateful of her help. Wat that was damn fucked up was my grandma actually tried to rub salt into wound and start describing the way they died and how bad it was. She just start pouring oil onto ruffled feathers and kept trying to worsen feelings n the situation.

THERE i shouted, stop. and my sis starts screaming at me. So yeah started the quarrel and shoutings. Fucked up.

K, didnt mean to use vulgarities but i have lost control of my self.

walaaouu im not a traitor. Gave in as a 'stranger' alrdy, im so torn apart.. :(

Im finally back to lj after so long cuz i couldnt find time!

So many things have happened within this period of time, but yeah i shall not get too off tracked from my topic. So i'll start about today!:D

Woke up at 10am (Im not that kind who kicks out of bed at noon:) I went to the mrt station as fast as my legs could carry me cuz i was late! Supposed to buy some files today with her, hmm. I had this strange feeling when she told me that shes at guardian so i went on searching up and down frantically for it. (went round the whole of pasir ris mrt) 'Was it me or was it whitesands?" So this thought occured to me when i was near desperation and i was like 'COULD IT BE SIMEI OR TAMPINESE MRT.. ?' And i was right, im a train ride away. So yeah that shows that im not that sua ku uh. ;)

I guess im gonna pretend colourblindness in front of Mr Pi cuz i bought a 'red' file.. I dont know if i'll get through, but who cares? :D Thats cool.:) I guess im gonna fight my way through:/ Gotta keep note to wear jeans or long pants next time or i'll seem like a kiddo. (I looked short D:)

Went back to whitesands after bidding goodbye. Ran up to popular was the first thing i did and spent some time there to get a perfect nice green file. (dunno if she likes it but i did thought much through) I gotta rush to cycle and find weiyan and allan at ris grandeur! I had to decide which route to take, which in the end i chose cycling cuz it had been long since i spent time with my bradders. So sorry neo, ka heng n fishball for being late. Was i wrong..

So yeah, everything was smooth sailing until the last part when Im returning back to our bicycle 'base'. My bike lan gah-ed and i flew off with a dive.(*whew* or i'll land on my face) The bike was scratchless but i did. :/ I guess i gotta consult Diana.

Today was a happy day although it was my 3rd cycling accident.:D

U make me completely lose my mood to do anything. For that kind of friend that u look at me as, and every word that we said n vowed. Do they mean nothing? And wheres ur will? Ur such a let down, am i wrong about you?